Smoking Cigarettes, Eating Glass: A Psychologist’s Memoir (SFWP Literary Awards), by Annita Perez Sawyer
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Smoking Cigarettes, Eating Glass: A Psychologist’s Memoir (SFWP Literary Awards), by Annita Perez Sawyer
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Annita Sawyer's memoir is a harrowing, heroic, and redeeming story of her battle with mental illness, and her triumph in overcoming it. In 1960, as a suicidal teenager, Sawyer was institutionalized, misdiagnosed, and suffered through 89 electroshock treatments before being transfered, labeled as "unimproved" The damage done has haunted her life. Discharged in 1966, after finally receiving proper psychiatric care, Sawyer kept her past secret and moved on to graduate from Yale University, raise two children, and become a respected psychotherapist. That is, until 2001, when she reviewed her hospital records and began to remember a broken childhood and the even more broken mental health system of the 1950s and 1960s, Revisiting scenes from her childhood and assembling the pieces of a lost puzzle, her autobiography is a cautionary tale of careless psychiatric diagnosis and treatment, both 50 years ago and today. It is an informative story about understanding PTSD and making emotional sense of events that can lead a soul to darkness. Most of all, it's a story of perseverance: pain, acceptance, healing, hope, and success. Hers is a unique voice for this generation, shedding light on an often misunderstood illness.
Smoking Cigarettes, Eating Glass: A Psychologist’s Memoir (SFWP Literary Awards), by Annita Perez Sawyer- Amazon Sales Rank: #136759 in Books
- Brand: Sawyer, Annita Perez
- Published on: 2015-06-01
- Released on: 2015-06-01
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.50" h x .70" w x 5.50" l, .0 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 310 pages
Review "This utterly gripping, sharply written memoir pulls no punches. With cauterizing honesty and a blessed sense of perspective, Annita Perez Sawyer takes you into and through her dark experience to the shores of wisdom." —Philip Lopate, author, Being With Children"How to mend a psyche shattered by personal trauma? Annita Sawyer seeks answers to that question, first for her patients and then for herself. In prose without a hint of self-pity, yet rich in sensory details and professional insight, she draws a dark history into the light." —Scott Russell Sanders, author, Divine Animal: A Novel"Annita Sawyer writes candidly — and gracefully — of her vulnerabilities and her persistence as she details her harrowing experience with a misdiagnosis, the hard-won life she forges in its wake, and her ultimate reconciliation with her buried past. Smoking Cigarettes, Eating Glass is a brave, compassionate, memorable book." —Jane Brox, author, Five Thousand Days Like This One: The Evolution of Artifical Light"This account of psychiatric misdiagnosis and mistreatment is remarkable for its narrative force, its palpable (and entirely justified) rage, and its fierce honesty." —Anne Fadiman, author, At Large and At Small and The Spirit Catches You and You Fall Down"Annita Sawyer's Smoking Cigarettes, Eating Glass is an extraordinary achievement, a memoir of a Yale-trained psychologist's harrowing struggle with serious mental illness and recovery. Beautifully written and full of heartbreak, hope and wisdom, for anyone with a personal or family history of mental illness, this is a must read." —Thomas H. Styron, Associate Professor of Psychiatry, Yale School of Medicine"A fiercely honest and beautifully written book." —Paul Austin, author, Beautiful Eyes and Something for the Pain“The author’s look back on her youth is especially absorbing from her perspective as a practicing psychologist who has treated people with mental illnesses similar to those she experienced.” —Library Journal
About the Author Annita Perez Sawyer has had a psychology practice for more than 30 years, and she is a member of the clinical faculty at Yale University. Her essays have won prizes and been included among the "Notables" in the Best American Essays series. She lives in North Branford, Connecticut.
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Most helpful customer reviews
8 of 9 people found the following review helpful. A brave true story about recovery from mental illness and trauma By Mary Jo Tewes Cramb A teenage mental patient endures dozens of shock treatments that cause her to lose all her memories. Years later, as a psychologist herself, she uncovers her medical records, which leads her to rediscover the traumatic memories that triggered her collapse as a young adult.One of the fascinating things about memoirs is the idea of reading a true story, of connecting not with a character, but a real person whose experience you can share. Sawyer takes us into the depths of the disturbed thinking caused by her illness and trauma. The beginning of the book is kind of hard to read because it's so upsetting to see someone treated this way by doctors and by her own mind. Later in the book, it's great to see Sawyer triumph over her illness and win professional and personal success. She makes a narrator who's easy to root for and care about.In this kind of writing, the writer always has to make tough choices about which events to emphasize and which to leave out entirely, and those choices can never exactly meet up with the interests of all readers. I was interested in Sawyer's family life and her relationships with her patients, but the focus of the book was on her own journey of understanding her past.Despite the intense subject matter, this story feels less raw than other memoirs I've read, almost sanitized at times. I think that difference is partly generational. Sawyer is a little older than the Baby Boomers, so she doesn't share that generation's extravagant personality. For example, Boomer Jeanette Walls also writes about her family's dysfunction, but the alcoholics in her family were a lot more flamboyant than the secretive ones in Sawyer's. Also, Sawyer's particular issues have to do with repression and dissociation, which naturally don't lead to wild tales of acting out a la Cheryl Strayed (a Gen-Xer).This story is about the courage it took for Sawyer to analyze herself, to look at her former self the way she looks at her patients, with empathy and kindness. One message of the book is for those who work in mental health, to be wary of misdiagnosis and projection. But beyond that, Sawyer writes with compassion about a lesson many of us need to learn at some point: how to forgive ourselves for what happened to us as kids. The ending of the book, as Sawyer begins to remember the truth about her childhood, is absorbing and disquieting.
4 of 4 people found the following review helpful. Smoking Cigarettes, Eating Glass is a dynamic memoir. ... By Jane L Weimar Smoking Cigarettes, Eating Glass is a dynamic memoir. Annita Sawyer offers compelling evidence of mistaken of a teenage diagnosis of schizophrenia. Key events in Annita’s life, from a suicidal teen in mental institutions to an accomplished woman of quality, substance and refinement are distilled with a clarity of images representing her prose.I applaud Annita for her bravery and courage to relate her personal experiences and her recollections of her childhood enmeshed so cogently. Her story is so engrossing that In the process of digesting her thoughts and actions, it was impossible to put down the book until the very end.Annita Sawyer offers compelling evidence of mistaken diagnosis of schizophrenia. Key events in Annita’s life, from a suicidal teen in mental institutions to an accomplished woman of quality, substance and refinement are distilled with a clarity of images representing her prose. Annita’s story is brave and courageous as she relates well to her childhood voice as well as her teen voice years, which brings the reader back their own personal experiences with mental institutions and her recollections are cogently enmeshed together. This memoir is so engrossing that In the process of digesting her thoughts and actions, it was impossible to put down the book until the end.Smoking Cigarettes, Eating Glass is more than a tale, however, it is also a therapy for those individuals who have abuse issues either in a hospital or at home. Be prepared as you read with tissues by your side.
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful. Highly recommended By Lenore Connellee Smoking Cigarettes, Eating Glass documents a rare journey by the author as a person and as a psychotherapist. As she says in the middle of the book, she was like a meteorologist swept up in a cyclone, taking notes and observing the chaos around her even as she was being slammed with hundred-mile-an-hour winds. Because her writing is so clear and authentic, so without drama, the reader can both feel drawn into her experience, and also understand and make sense of it. For any reader who is wondering about a similar journey they might take into their own past, the book could be a guide. The author weaves frightening events and images into a tapestry that also includes humor, gratitude, and healing retreats into the natural world. Her graceful yet unflinching portrayal of her childhood and adolescence, coupled with her ability to move back and forth between past and present, enable the reader to stay with her. In some memoirs, the writer re-interprets his or her own past in light of what is learned or revealed along the way. This memoir is a little different, because it wasn’t a gradual process of new understandings that came to make sense over time. Sawyer has her own hidden backstory handed to her in a UPS package, when she is in her late 50s. She is the one who lived it, she is the one who reads it decades later, and also the one who translates it and understands its real meaning, given what we know now about trauma, and didn’t know then.
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